I like to think I am a fairly confident person, but I am sensitive. Emotional nuances are never lost on me, and being around passive aggressive people saps my energy like a vampire sucks blood. In most aspects of my life I am mature enough and secure enough to be pretty confident. But the other day I saw a video blip of a sermon on Facebook that stopped me in my tracks.
Bam. My head was (and still is) spinning, thinking of all the areas of my life where I feel like I don’t measure up, or I don’t fit in. It is so freeing to recognize those areas and say guess what, you don’t get to label me.
I have been into a home based business for a couple of years now. Over the past few months I started feeling a bit excluded in some of the leadership groups. My journey hasn’t been the same as some others because my priorities are different. I started to feel like I didn’t measure up. Like I had to do more to earn respect and not be looked at as a failure. Like I wasn’t worthy of friendship because of my sales totals. I started pushing myself to attend every meeting and class I could, and overloaded my already-busy schedule to the point of burnout. Then I realized, I was making myself miserable because I was allowing someone else to name me.
I have written before about some of the hurt I have experienced in the church. This past December I permanently broke ties with my home church of 8 years. It was hurtful. People who I thought were friends disappeared when I was no longer warming the same pew every Sunday. When my family desperately needed the support of brothers and sisters in the church, it wasn’t there. It made me angry. Who were they to decide my worthiness based on where I went to church? But thats just it – they don’t have naming rights.
If you really stop and take an honest look, I’m sure we all have areas in our lives where we have allowed people and circumstances to make us feel like we are less. Many times those people don’t even feel that way about us, but through actions and unspoken words we have allowed them to make us feel lesser anyway. What a life-changing realization that it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. Or what we think they think, because generally we imagine things to be much more sinister than reality.
Our heavenly father has labeled us worthy (2 Thessalonians 1:11-12). He calls us his friends (John 15:15). He calls us beloved (Deuteronomy 33:12). He calls us his children (2 Corinthians 6:18). The creator of the universe has deemed us worthy to be his heirs (Romans 8:17), so who really cares what anyone else thinks? Brush it off and hold your head up high. I hope this realization allows you to let go of any area you have been made to feel like a failure, and given you permission to stop caring what other people think.